The Mishandled Grievance — Why First Responses Matter
THE SCENARIO
An employee reported experiencing discrimination to HR, expecting support. The HR manager followed the company’s grievance policy, but her communication gave the impression she was more focused on protecting the company than caring for the employee. Her first response was to stress confidentiality before the employee had even finished sharing his experience.
The investigation later found no evidence of discrimination. While the outcome may have been fair, the employee’s perception of the process was not. He felt dismissed from the start, as though HR was prioritising legal risk over his wellbeing. He appealed the outcome, reported the matter to TAFEP, and what could have been a contained issue escalated into a full-blown trust crisis.
THE HR DILEMMA
Reminding employees of confidentiality when reporting misconduct is standard practice. As an external investigator, I also remind interviewees of that at the beginning and end of interviews. Some companies even require HR to mention the seriousness of false accusations when receiving complaints. The problem here was not the procedure itself — it was the timing and delivery. Complaints of discrimination are highly sensitive, and the very first words HR uses can make or break trust.
THE TURNING POINT
For this employee, the breaking point was clear:
“She cautioned me about confidentiality even before I finished telling her what happened to me!”
The lesson is simple: when receiving a complaint, HR’s first priority should be active listening. Empathy can be expressed in a professional way, such as, “I’m sorry you experienced this, and I want to understand what happened.” Tone, body language, and genuine attention matter. Confidentiality and fairness are still crucial — but they should be explained once the employee feels heard and supported.
WHAT HR CAN LEARN
First Impressions Matter: The tone of the first response shapes the employee’s trust in the entire process.
Empathy Builds Compliance: Showing care doesn’t mean ignoring procedures — it makes them easier to follow.
Listen Before You Instruct: Active listening and empathy should come before policy reminders.
Timing is Everything: Confidentiality and fairness should be explained after establishing rapport, not before.
Trust is Fragile: Mishandling grievances can damage not just the case but company culture.
We use case studies similar to this simplified version in our workshops to generate discussion and impactful learning points for HR managers. Have a look at our workshops to find out more.
